Thanks in advance

From time to time, Jared will say something that has a totally different and quite often rude meaning to me. One of the more tame examples is when he is praying, he often says to God, "Thanks in advance for everything You will do here tonight..." I suppose with God, it's safe to thank Him in advance for things He has promised to do, for He will surely do them.
But for some reason, when I hear that phrase, I think of it as an insincere manner of trying to coerce someone into doing something. Like a letter in the post, "...Thanks in advance for your donation of $200 in support of Loggers Against the Mistreatment of Elms (LAME)..." Maybe i feel that way about the phrase because of this video.
That phrase makes me think about how I feel trapped by so many things. I feel trapped by people's expectations of me. Trapped by their ideas of who I am and who I ought to be and do. Trapped in the middle of so many disputes. Sometime people can be pretty tough to handle. If I were to make a list of the top things that have stressed me out over the past year, very few would be situational. Things like not knowing if I'll have work in a few months, or upcoming bills and taxes, or being busier than I have a right to be wouldn't rank too highly. If I made a list of things that cause my hair to turn gray, I'd have to say they'd be primarily relational. I'm stressed out from the grievances over anything and everything people want to vent at me. Stressed out by all the undercurrents passing around all the people I know. I'm tired of trying to be a mediator. And super exhausted trying to decrypt what the block people mean when I'm sure they're trying to say something important in a vague or misleading manner.
As I mentioned before, I have a bit of a problem with people being willfully misleading. I know I say this as a person who has been labelled a frustratingly subtle person. So go ahead and say, "quoth the Mr. Pot to Mr. Kettle." But I've been burned by manipulative people before and I'm loath to suffer them any longer. If you want a glass of water, there are easy ways to ask; don't send me to the desert and expect me to figure out that means you're thirsty, and then become upset when I don't bring any back. If you want bread, don't let me know by telling me you want rice and that you don't really care for bread. I'm not a mind-reader and I have no desire to become one!
But that doesn't mean I think everyone should just come out and say everything. Some things are best left unsaid. For instance, I hear a lot of the politics going on at work and while knowing about the currents and undercurrents, or tides and rip tides help me not to put my foot in it, it certainly doesn't make me feel great hearing about them. Even today, I was reporting to my supervisor when someone interrupted to verbally rip one of our many bosses up one side and down the other. Should I put a stop to the tirade and make them even more angry? My heart sinks when I know someone approaches me with that look that means they have some troubling gossip and they're not leaving until I've heard it. Why? Because people seem to like to vent at me. Maybe I just have that kind of face. Maybe I emanate an aura of caring. Maybe they see me as trustworthy wall against which to bounce.
But the problem is, I've always hated it when people are hostile towards each other. At some point during my life. after having realized that I couldn't avoid being around such situations, I became predisposed to mediate between friends. But the problem is, in most cases, by the time you realize mediation is necessary, it's already gotten too emotional - in which case people just want to be mad at each other. I've found that the correct application of humour can sometimes dissolve a confrontation. That or turn the acrimony of both parties upon yourself. Sometimes I think that's still a better alternative than listening to people nattering at each other...

Would it be alright if I moved to Alaska?