Late night incoherencies

Danny and I spent another late night over pancakes
We talked about soccer and how every man's just the same
And made speculation on the 'who's and the 'when's of our futures
And how everyone's lonely but still we just couldn't complain
...
But you know I know better I'm not gonna worry 'bout nothing
'Cause if the birds and the flowers survive then I'll make it okay
If given a chance and a rock see which one breaks a window
And see which one keeps me up all night and into the day
-Caedmon's Call

I arrived late at work this morning. At 9am. Last night, I was feeling excited and enthusiastic about my day and ended up talking on the phone with a friend past one in the morning. And then having some dinner.

The conversation touched upon all the uncertainties that seem to involve interpreting the opposite gender. Lately, I've been realizing that I'm not a very good authority to explain men in general to a woman. I can make a guess at what's going through a guy's head based upon what would be going through mine. But in some ways, I'm not exactly a good example of your standard guy. I mean, what kind of normal guy would come out with absurd statements like the following...

Never in the past seven years have I cared less than I do now that I'm single. Lately, I feel God has been drawing me out of my comfort areas in so many ways. Am I being cultivated and grown into something new more than ever? Suppose I were to attach myself to another person. First of all, if my spiritual life is indeed in a state of flux right now, someone who is spiritually compatible with me would probably not be so much longer. Should I not be what God would have me be before distracting myself with a partner? Also , my priorities would be split. Doors would close - I would no longer be able to just pick up and go where He leads. It would have to be a joint decision and there are some things that only a single person can accomplish.

But then there are other things that require a partner. And who can really say that they are done growing?

I suppose the real reason I'm alright with this situation is because I know God has called me for a purpose. If that requires a partner, I'll know it when He provides the right one. If it requires autonomy from another person... Well, the place God would have me be is the most rewarding place to be.

How many times have I heard it said, 'if God has placed the desire in your heart, He will make it come to pass'? How comforting. But I have to say, I don't much like that statement for one reason. It's a bit misleading, as it tends to imply that the desire of your heart is from God. To me, it does not sound at all like a God-centred line of thinking but a self-centred one.

Someone once told me she had a friend who had been very anxious that she was not married. She told me that it wasn't until this girl stopped looking that she found a man.

But maybe I can manipulate that into some better advice. Seek first His Kingdom. Then pay attention to His council; do not let His words fall to the ground.